a new way of looking at...     love >> internet and romance - 2

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couple the first two together, and now we're able to send out a smoke signal to the entire internet to publicize ourselves, almost commercially. we can find chat rooms for people who like philosophy and techno music in the midwest, and pow, you have a veritable market for meeting people. we're also more willing to talk about ourselves without fear of rejection because we don't have to deal with those people on a daily basis. if we make an ass of ourselves, we can shift screen name and try again. we are able to find anything we want, and keep trying virtually until we get it right or decide that's not for us.

the next step in my argument is a bit more contraversal. we live in a world where we can have any material possession in our fingertips at the drop of a hat, which is not likely in real life when searching for a relationship. i firmly maintain that no real relationship can flourish over the internet without a healthy amount of self-deception or prior contact. you don't know who you are talking to, not how they act in the world. you don't know which persona they are putting on. you don't even know how old they are, what gender they are, etc. those things that matter aren't available to you as well. this self-deception and outright deception by the other player puts most internent relationships in dire straits when they finally come together. not all, mind you, i know of at least one happy couple that met over the internet (kudos to jim and maria, you know who you are).

to bring it all together, i think that the internet furthers this romantic ideal of the "one true love" out there for us, and that we can ditch the one we are with because of it's ability to pinpoint what we want in a mate. the problem i have is that this is simply not realistic. any relationship can blossom as long as both parties come seeking to change and be changed by the other. that binding together of lifestyles, viewpoints, love solidifies a real relationship. once you make the choice to jump ship on the internet to find "the one true love", you will never be satisfied because you will continue the search for "the one", and i don't mean neo you matrix junkies. ::smile::